May 18 2007
“Add Five Words” Discussion
Seeing how the Add Five Words story hasn’t completely self-destructed yet, I’m creating this post so you can leave comments about this story here instead of filing up the SWT message board.
There’s an inverse relationship between how good something is for you and how much fun it is.
The Add Five Words story is working out alright so far, but Greg’s “branches from the tree on” poses a challenge. Perhaps if “on” was changed to “in.” Anyway, we’ll see what happens.
I shoulda gone with my original first line: “had vanquished the last Klingon…”
There’s a challenge for the “Add Five Words” story: make it rhyme.
okay… i am having fun with this five word thing….please someone put in words that describe what jody is really like…..
yeah…phillip the ryhming thing adds a interesting demension…jesus i have no social life….hey jody..i had a problem with the computer and the IT guys came and fixed it right away….i said boys i am not an open heart surgeon, this is not live organ transplants….the response was that to the IT department councillors are “GOD”…we prempt almost any other effort….eeshhh i have to go lie down the weight of my head is becoming oppresive…ohhh the power the power…my dteam of deity status is in my grasp….who nees facebook when your have swt guestbook….
Uh-oh. J-Walk posted a link the “Add Five Words” story. The extra traffic is likely to mess up the lovely narrative we have going here. Let me see… Yup, it’s already ready begun to loose coherence. Not that it was jam-packed full of coherence to begin with. I may jump in and edit a bit if I feel like it. We’ll see…
Ya, I think you should edit the comments now.
They’ve been edited and some deleted. I’m not too concerned with the fidelity of the experiment. J-Walk’s contributions are excellent. Tom’s aren’t too shabby either.
yeah I know phillip, or jody just do not say anything….
Steve, I deleted your last comment (even though it was a good one) in the Add Five Words post because you posted two in a row and posted two in the same day. Come on, man, it’s not going to work unless we all follow the rules!
jody delete 48 and 49 on the five word thing…i frigged up…thanks
Just deleted the comments, Tom, and added my own. Gotta plug that Canadian content to counteract that RuPaul reference.
Punctuation and syntax will be corrected afterwards, so if anyone wants to start a new sentence, just capitalize it and I’ll fix things up later. Almost 50 comments so far.
Sorry Phillip… I only read the first five words of your rules. :)
Tommyboy, I deleted your last message too because you broke the one-comment-per-day rule. I gotta keep cracking the whip here!
phillip i missed the once a day rule…i agree with the no concurrent posts…but once a day…come on.. this is my life…my reason for existence…without this only oblivion awaits….
such renegades, such revolutionaries…i must go smoke my cigar..fidel pink
Just before I turn off the comments on the Add Five Words post, we’ll have a free-for-all and see what happens. (Just not today.)
Derek Dick? Nice try, Tom.
> Derek Dick?
You’re only noticing that now?!
No, but I’m just letting Tom know that I’m cracking down on him.
beat me beat me ohhh please….
Geddy Lee has been banned!
poor geddy, could alex, or neil come out to play or perhaps lenny from motorhead…mayby i should have used nana mouskouri…
phillip i have had to work on the computer a lot in the last couple of days and it is so easy to squander time coming over here instead of working….good thing this is not my normal method of employment
You should have picked Roger Whitiker.
Okay, Tom, here’s the deal: You and only you can add more than one comment per day to the story IF you come up with some really good names and the spelling is correct. But just you because we’re old friends who have reunited through the beauty of the interweb.
no no i must learn to play by the rules…plus i crumble under pressure
“physically, satiated”? WTF? That was a toughie to follow up on :)
My thoughts exactly, Rebecca.
“he relieved the flatulence built”?!
Okay, this has to be Tommyboy or Tommy’s Brudder. Fess up!
This may qualify as a comment worthy of deletion if only for the sake of the children. How many times do we have to get into flatulence here?
i was not the farting facilitator…and the satieted physically was a perfect set up to delve in the spiritiual decay and despair of our post modern industrial society….eeeesh it was a a gimmie…..but i have been playing by the rules…no more ghost writer nomikers….and only once a day….
Then it was your brudder. Had to be. I can sense a family resemblance. Anyway, the story hasn’t died yet. I don’t know how we’re going to pull it out of this flatulence hole we’ve dug for ourselves.
Except for a brief surge of belligerent, almost hateful, comments near the beginning, I haven’t had to delete many inappropriate comments. I had to modify one comment because it was only four words. Besides that, I’ve only made corrections for spelling and syntax.
Once it’s done, I should make a movie out of it.
I would love to hear the story read by someone like Alistair Cooke.
I’ll move the comments related to this from the SWT message board to this post sometime this weekend.
no no no not alister cooke..if he is alive….come on…there is only one man to read this story!
GORDEN PINSENT!
or bubbles…
The last comment was deleted because it was 4 words and could not grammatically fit with the previous 5 words.
I think the story heading for a dead end. So it goes.
Okay, it’s not dead YET. But man that was close.
“Added to the excitement of Bea Arthur using the Bowflex…” WTF?
Okay, I’m not even sure that’s grammatically correct. If nothing can be done with it, I’ll delete it. But what the hell? Are guys deliberately going for a sentence that’s impossible to finish? What about Albert’s car keys? Will he ever find them? What’s Jody’s role in this narrative? And now we have Bea Arthur?
You’re all friggin’ nuts.
SCA = Society for Creative Anachronism. Is it cheating if I use a short form?
Nope. Jody got away with using a contraction as one word, so go for it.
I was in the SCA for a couple of years. I’s a sward fightar.
The last 5 comments were wiped because they didn’t even come close to making any kind of grammatical sense. I think I’m going to pull the plug soon.
phillip can you fix that r i hit submit before i deleted it…ya i was like…kinda…you know…proofreading..ha ha ha ha ha
I can fix anything, Tommyboy. I’m God at this blog. Or is that co-God?
I keep trying to get the story back to the keys but it is difficult in five words and then of course it goes some where else..i thought for a while the love quest would have been interesting….so it goes…
phillip end it…end it now…..
Are you kidding, man? We got Mr. Potatohead in on it now! I think this will be the last week of it though.
I have a challenge to make the last week of the story interesting. But I’ll tell you tomorrow.
Feel free to insert yourself as a character. But play nice.
NOTE the update to “the rules” of the story:
If there have been at least 3 comments since your last comment, consider it a new day and post another 5 words if you want.
“twenty acres of bats”? WTF? An acre is a measurement of land, isn’t it? How does one convert acres to bats? Don’t be surprised if I delete this one.
UPDATE: I killed it. And I think I’m going to pull the plug real soon.
No! If Han Solo can do the Kessel run in 20 parsecs, we can have 20 acres of bats!
I moved all the comments related to this from the message-board to this post.
Rebecca,
> I shoulda gone with my original first line: “had vanquished the last Klingon…”
I agree. But it’s never too late!
Anyone want to suggest a title for the story before I shut it down?
The confession begins to comment 30. The flatulence comment was redundant, but the theme continued (twice) throughout the story without comment. And like all great literary work, the theme was subtle. I guess too subtle for SWT readers.
As well, SWT (and notably its hosts) did not pick up on the literary connections of some of the writers of “It is Accomplished”. Another missed theme (thrice). Again, perhaps too subtle for the audience.
Welcome to literary ghenna.
> SWT (and notably its hosts) did not pick up on the literary connections
Au contraire.
“It is accomplished” is a reference to Nikos Kazantzakis whose novel THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST is much better than the film. Michael Smith is a Canadian author I’ve never bothered to read because he’s not dead yet. “Rocketship underpants” should be obvious. Hmm… Is Harold Haller somebody I should know?
Geeks.
Okay. I’ll give you the farting themes: “…flat. Usually…”, “broken. Wind..”.
Now, the minor test (if I may hijack your blog). Name the three fake “writers” of this story (and their respective originating novels).
I’ll even make it interesting. A prize. For the first person to figure who these literary people are, a very own SWT coffee mug (to go with the CBC mug that half of SWT readers probably have).
By the way, I’ve trademarked the mug. It’s actually a tea cup. Like those cheap ones your grandmother had. The see through ones. Too small for a real cup of tea. And embarrassing to drink coffee from.
All yours if you dare to partake.
I’m timing you Phillip. Tommyboy, if he even gets one (I know he can’t even google), I’ll send him a mug.
Picture to follow.(click for larger view)
Didn’t I just answer these questions? Jude Fawley as in Jude the Obscure by Mr. Hardy. Michael Smith — got ‘em already. Never read ‘em because he’s not dead yet… Those are the only two I know without the aid of Google. So you can send me 2/3 of the teacup. Just break the handle off.
I updated Tommy’s Brudder’s comment with photos of the unique prize mug.
That is definitely a trademarkable tea cup. Sweet.
Jude is a given. My 3 year old knew that one. Wrong on the Michael Smith. The writer is “V. Michael Smith”. Its not that easy.
I do have to report that Tommyboy prompted me for answers. I consider this cheating and beneath the dignity of SWT. Further, I recommend that he be banned from SWT.
To make it easy, here are the “writers”:
“Jude Fawley (done), Harold Haller, V. Michael Smith and me”. “Me” doesn’t count because it is Phillip and cannot be considered a fictional character. Unless Jody has created this vast persona of a “brother” just to make SWT seem more interesting. Not that this character of “Phillip” is very interesting, but just the concept.
Anyway..
I think Tommy’s Brudder may be the first to guess is: “Phillip” doesn’t actually exist. My name is Betty-Lou, and I’m Jody’s second cousin. I have a Ph.D. in Computer Science and Electronic Engineering. I assist Jody with the maintenance of this blog from time to time. I’m in contact with Phillip about once a month. He provides me with personal information I can use to pass myself off as “Phillip.” But I’m sick of living the lie. For now on if I post anything to SWT, it’ll be under my real name: Betty-Lou. Anything posted by “Phillip” from this day forward will actually be from Phillip. I can’t live like this anymore.
Okay I must confess, Tommys Brudder is actually an artificial intelligence experiment gone wrong…striving to create and entity to solve the ills of the world has adversely resulted in this egomaniac, narrssisitic being that the developers are now trying to determine how best to terminate….mary lo or phillip could do their part in the ridding of this entity by banning all future posts and erasing any evidence of said beings existencece…we must do what we have the power to do….
I can’t believe nobody has stepped up to the challenge. I fear an outsider to SWT will sneak in and win the cup.
1. Harold Haller
2. V. Michael Smith
Phil, my estimation of you has diminished. I know you have these books on your shelves, or in a box or propping up an end table. Jody probably has them as well but thinks this whole deal is a waste of his blogosphere.
Tommyboy, have you looked at the photos yet? Take the mouse (the little thingy connected by a string to the back of the computer box) and move the little arrow (on the screen) onto the picture and click the button (while over the picture). It gets bigger. (Said in Mr. Roger’s voice). Notice anything you want to complain about?
you thievin’ bastard….but that brings to mind the philisophical question…if you steal something but the person does not notice have you really stolen anything…look out i hear a tree falling….in the woods…or hark i can hear…the sound of one hand clapping..
And as Apu once said….
ha ha ha ha ha
That’s the first time I’ve webcasted a Simpson’s character. I accomplish so much through this blog!
(I think Tommyboy and his brudder are spending more time here than me. Jody — you might need to give them posting privileges.)
Perfect. I think SWT needs more porn and I need a place to host my porn downloads. And all my private thoughts. About porn.
whose blog is this?
You guys are still here? Jesus christ, I think it’s your blog now.
You know what this blog needs? A Mr. Baggio.
Blogs are a waste of time. And people who comment/post on them are idiots.
I’m sorry. I was dehydrated. A weekend of drinking public water and fluoridization has calmed me. I feel better, more docile. Blogs are good. People who blog are good. Religion is good. The government is good.