Roy Zimmerman Sings About Life

Roy Zimmerman is a satirical songwriter, poking fun at all dumb things. His YouTube channel features lots of amusing songs.

His Vasectomy piece made me laugh, especially since I know what it’s like.

The first step is the shaving, which I gotta say I did not find sexy at all. I know there are whole specialty periodicals on this very subject. But for me, shaving my nards was . . . Larry King in a swimsuit, it was about that sexy.
In all, it’s about 15 minutes of excruciating inconvenience. And for two weeks I walked like C-3PO.

What If the Beatles Were Irish? is another popular tune.

Another Joke

Two Southern ladies, Maribelle and AnneMarie, were sitting on the porch drinking mint juleps. They have the following conversation, best imagined with an upscale Southern drawl:

Maribelle: AnneMarie, do you see this huge diamond ring?

AnneMarie: Yes.

Maribelle: My husband bought this for me.

AnneMarie: Isn’t that special.

Maribelle: Do you see that Jaguar in the parking lot?

AnneMarie: Yes.

Maribelle: My husband bought that for me.

AnneMarie: Isn’t that special.

Maribelle: And you know that mansion I live in?

AnneMarie: Yes.

Maribelle: My husband bought that for me.

AnneMarie: Isn’t that special.

Maribelle: And this plump, ripe tomato I’m about to eat? My husband bought that for me.

AnneMarie: Isn’t that special.

Maribelle: What did your husband buy for you, AnneMarie?

AnneMarie: My husband sent me to finishing school. That’s where I learned to say, “Isn’t that special” instead of “fuck you.”

(via The Dilbert Blog)

(Joke has been changed from the original to keep Phillip happy – see below.)