Me? Sarcastic?!

The Sarcasm Society:

Sarcasm usually requires a quick wit, and the ability to extract the minutest points of weakness in a conversation. So it is quite unlikely that it is the lowest form of humor as some would like to call it. Perhaps not being able to enjoy sarcasm is directly related to not having the ability to come up with sarcastic comments, which in turn creates a feeling of inadequacy…
Now I know what most of you are going to say, and I cannot wait to hear from each and every one of you.

The author provides How To Be Sarcastic: A Beginners Guide for you deprived souls who need some practice.

Sarcasm can be difficult in non-verbal communication, often construed as an insult or being incomprehensible if not explicit about your intention. Online Sarcasm describes methods most of us are familiar with, such as using an emoticon (which I loath):

However, be forewarned that the chances of your emoticons successfully communicating your intentions are entirely dependant on the quality of your sardonicity, as well as the opposite party’s ability to comprehend sarcasm.

I still propose the Sarcasm Point though¡

It’s Cold Out

Environment Canada issued this weather warning today:

Environment Canada’s Official Weather Warnings
Moncton and southeast New Brunswick
4:30 AM AST Tuesday 6 February 2007
Wind chill warning for Moncton and southeast New Brunswick continued
Extreme wind chill values near minus 36 are expected this morning.
This is a warning that extreme wind chill conditions are expected in these regions. Monitor weather conditions..Listen for updated statements.
A very cold airmass will persist over the province for the next few days. Light westerly winds this morning are forecast to bring wind chill values occasionally reaching minus 36.

The thermometer in my car said -27 this morning. Subtract another 10-15 degrees for the wind.

Breast Milk For Pork Eating Adults!

support breast feedingThe Lactivist Breastfeeding Blog is written by a work-at-home mom who supports breastfeeding, selling products from her cafepress store. A lot of her profits are donated to her local human milk banking group (yeah, I didn’t know such a thing existed either, and my wife is a leader of La Leche League – I should know this stuff).

Jennifer, the author of the blog, recently received a letter (PDF) from The National Pork Board:

It stated, for the most part, that my use of the phrase “the other white milk” violates their trademark on the phrase “the other white meat.” As such, they’ve demanded that I remove the shirt, demanded that the image of the shirt be removed from any site I know of, demanded that I destroy any shirts that exist with the logo and demand that I not at any point in the future use the phrase in a commercially profitable way.

But that’s not the best part. As Jennifer writes:

As best I can tell, the issue that REALLY has their panties in a wad is expressed in this quote from the cease and desist letter:
“In addition, your use of this slogan also tarnishes the good reputation of the National Pork Board’s mark in light of your apparent attempt to promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption, such as with the following slogans on your website in close proximity to the slogan “The Other White Milk.” “Dairy Diva,” “Nursing, Nature’s Own Breast Enhancement,” “Eat at Mom’s, fast-fresh-from the breast,” and “My Milk is the Breast.”
Go back and read that again. “apparent attempt to promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption.”
Do they think I’m trying to an promote an adult breastfeeding fetish??!

I hope this publicity raises lots of money for her cause. Good luck, Jennifer!

(via Stupid Evil Bastard)

The First Thing I’ll Miss When Civilisation Collapses…

woman in showerHot showers. I recently read this passage in Ian McEwan‘s Saturday, which reminded of its luxury that does wonders:

When this civilisation falls, when the Romans, whoever they are this time round, have finally left and the new dark ages begin, this [a shower] will be one of the first luxuries to go. The old folk crouching by their peat fires will tell their disbelieving grandchildren of standing naked mid-winter under jet streams of hot clean water, of lozenges of scented soaps and of viscous amber and vermilion liquids they rubbed into their hair to make it glossy and more voluminous than it really was, and of thick white towels as big as togas, waiting on warming racks.