My Cat, Nigel… Bleeding

STUPID CATMy stupid cat jumped up into the cupboard tonight, or at least tried, and when he jumped, he knocked over some Mason jars that immediately smashed into a thousand pieces in the kitchen sink. He then bolted into my bedroom and hid under the bed. He knew he was in trouble, but he also had the living daylights scared out of him, so I left him alone while I cleaned up the glass. Then I noticed dabs of blood on the kitchen floor, and it wasn’t from me. So I opened some cat treats, got the cat out from under the bed and noticed he was limping on a hind leg. I fed him treats while I tried to examine his back feet. Which was fun. Eventually a shard of glass fell out of his paw. I checked for blood while he tried to squrm away, didn’t see any, then let him go before he gave me a good scratch. I don’t see any more blood, so I guess he’ll live.

I’ve never been much of a cat person.

What Songs For The Guitar Should I Learn (And Re-learn)?

playing the guitarNow that I bought my first acoustic guitar (I’ve always borrowed Phillip’s, who has had at least three, I think: classical, regular acoustic, and a 12 string), what songs should I learn to impress the chicks?

I USED to know a lot of tunes, but that was 20 years ago: The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Rolling Stones, etc. Plus I taught myself how to play The Trees and Closer To The Heart (I still remember to play its beginning) by Rush, and similar guitar songs.

Songs I do NOT care to learn: anything by Bon Jovi or most other Top 40 bands.

I gotta figure out some kid songs for my children, too.

Shave and a Haircut (Another Big Thought)

I got a haircut today. I now look like a pencil-necked geek.

At one point the barber shaved the back of my neck. He lathered up some cream that he mixed in a cup by adding some hot water. He brushed it on the back of my neck and then shaved off the fussy hairs with a straight razor.

It was so relaxing, I’ve decided to grow my beard out a bit the next time I get my hair cut so he can give me a shave too.

Everyone Gets Time-outs

One of the daily rituals with my daughter (who started school this year) is finding out how many time-outs she received during the day.

Her: Only one today, Dad!
Me: Alright! High-five!

Well, last night was our first parent-teacher meeting and I was expecting the worst:

You’re CAITLYN’S parents?! You don’t look like awful parents.

It went well, though. The teacher said she isn’t different from any of the other kids who are getting used to the classroom routines.

I should probably stop asking about time-outs.

Krazy Glue in My Mouth

I had a tube of Krazy Glue explode in my face today. I squeezed it too hard when apparently the end was all gunked up.

I just got back from the emergency room.

The glue was in my mouth, on my tongue, the back of my throat, my lips and my left cheek. I also got some in my eye, but it was quickly washed away by tears.

I walked to a hospital down the street from me. I spent 2.5 hours in the emergency waiting room, then said the hell with it. I was concerned about glue in my mouth. I could feel it stuck to my throat and my tongue, and I thought it was poison.

It’s not.

After 2 hours all the glue in my mouth had completely dissolved, and I wasn’t sick. So I figured I was alright and could swallow with ease again.

I’m about to soak my lips and my face in warm water to wash the glue off. If that doesn’t work, then it’s the nail polish remover.

Crazy glue indeed.

UPDATE (the next day): Thankfully the bit of glue that got in my eye got washed out by tears almost immediately. But there was glue stuck to my tongue, and some on the back of my throat where I could feel it burning. I didn’t swallow for at least an hour afterwards. The glue on my lips and my face wasn’t pretty either, but I wasn’t too concerned about it.

The glue in my mouth gradually dissolved away. I tried soaking my face in water to remove the glue like they recommend at krazyglue.com, but I couldn’t hold my breath long enough.

So I just walked around with glue on my face all day until I finished work. Then I went to a drug store, got some nail polish remover, and wiped my face with it. Done.

Getting it in my eye was kind of scary though.