“What Button Do I Press?”

A recent phone conversation:

Mom: How do I play a DVD?
Me: Did you put it in? What’s on the screen?
Mom: A TV channel.
Me: Change to channel three.
Mom: Okay, I see “Play movie” and other stuff now.
Me: Good. Press “Play” or “Enter” on the remote.
Mom: The remote has no labels. The buttons are all shaped like arrows.
Me: Press the one that looks like a Play button, or it could be a button bigger than others.
Mom: I’m afraid to press something in case I mess it all up.
Me: You want me to go to your house to press one button on your remote?
Mom: No. Never mind. Thanks. Bye.