I’m not talking about the vibration setting, which is too short and wimpy to do anyone any good. I’m talking about talking. Connecting with each other. Getting kinky with devices that let you experiment with gender and species. Seducing a stranger or a spouse, although I wouldn’t suggest doing so at the same time unless you’re all three into that.
One of her favorite techniques is the erotic cliffhanger, where you figure out the maximum length allowed for a single message on your lover’s phone. Call when you know he or she can’t answer and start talking. “Go into detail,” she says, describing what you’d like to do to them, right now or tomorrow or next week, “and then at exactly the right moment — BEEEEP.”
Man, do I have an anecdote related to this:
About 15 years ago my brother and I lived in a one room basement apartment in Cote St. Luc, Quebec, a suburb of Montreal. The apartment had a kitchen the size of closet; a bathroom smaller than an outhouse; and a living room/bedroom big enough to fit a single bed, couch that folded out into a bed, a dresser, and a steel white table (no kidding).
One night the phone rang around 2am. I don’t remember who answered it, but I ended up talking to the lusty female voice wanting to know how, uh, big I was. This continued for at least a month, her calling in the early AM, sometimes talking about books and music (she was a Kate Bush fan), but eventually talking about sex. I eventually grew tired of it, which she noticed during one call (I probably said “This is boring”), and she never phoned back. I don’t remember Phillip ever talking to her, the chicken.