Joke Of The Year

A man was walking home alone late one foggy night, when behind him he hears a…
…BUMP!
Then another…BUMP!

And another…BUMP!

Walking faster, he looks behind him, peering through the curtain of fog, and makes out the shape of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.
BUMP!..BUMP!…BUMP!

Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing ever faster behind him!

BUMP!…BUMP!
And FASTER!
BUMP!BUMP!BUMP!!

He runs up to his house, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes inside, slams and locks the door behind him. But the casket crashes through his door! The lid of the casket is now banging and clapping as the monstrosity continues to bump along toward him!

Clappity-BUMP! Clappity-BUMP! Clappity-BUMP!

With the strange, scary, animated box of death hard on his heels, the terrified man continues to run for his life! Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, he locks himself inside. His heart is pounding! His head is reeling! His breath is coming in short, sharp, sobbing gasps!

And with a loud CrrrrRASH! the horrific casket breaks down his bathroom door, bumping and clapping its way toward him. The man screams for his life, simultaneously reaching for something — anything! — to throw at the horrifying thing. But the only substantially heavy object he finds is bottle of cough syrup! Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket and…

…(wait for it)…

…the coffin stops.

(Last year’s joke)

4 Replies to “Joke Of The Year”

  1. … the coffin stips.

    the coffin stops! What brand of cough syrop was it… I’ve tried a cough syrup that could stop a nasty coughin’ like that…

  2. Nominated as the best short joke this year!

    A three-year-old little boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.

    “Mom,” he asked, “are these my brains?”

    “Not yet,” replied his mother.

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