I Didn’t Win The Lotto, But I DID Win…

I received a call while in Ottawa from the company I order my home oil from:

Mr. Cairns? This is Blue Wave. You won a $2000 Entertainment Center.

After I tell them to Fuck Off, asking if they’re serious, they laugh (I like people who don’t take swearing seriously) and say they are serious. It’s the 2nd prize given in a contest for referring people to their company.

Congratulations also go out to Jody Caines from Moncton for winning a $2,000 Home Entertainment Package. Jody referred a friend to the Thermoshell branch in Moncton.

They spelled my last name wrong.

The $2000 doesn’t HAVE to go towards a Home Entertainment Package. I pick the electronic store I want the gift certificate made out to, where I could buy $2000 worth of blank VHS tapes.

So, what should I buy with my $2000?

How To Win The Lotto

how to win the lotto for dummiesLottery retailers in Ontario are winning the lotto a tad too much to be a coincidence, according to CBC in Lottery retailers enjoying luck of the draw:

…in the past seven years Ontario clerks and retailers have claimed lottery victories nearly 200 times, a statistical anomaly according to one expert.
“So we can say the chance, to be precise, is about one chance in a trillion, trillion, trillion, trillion, so it’s just inconceivable they’d be winning that many more times than we’d expect them to…”

I always check the lotto myself, as you all know.

The full report is on CBC’s The Fifth Estate tonight.

(I made the fake book cover using the Dummies Book Cover Generator)